WHAT DO I DO NOW??

All my life being happy has been one thing i wanted to live for, everyday came to  me as a surprise, and could live my life everyday knowing theres still tomorrow.

20 years down the line and I only have achieved so little but i still put on a huge smile and thank God for a whole lot He's given me. But i always wondered why me? why do I get what I want, why do I have both parents whereas my friend have none? why do I always get the best boyfriend whereas she can't even last long in her relationships? I then realise she might have something that I don't have "STRENGTH"!!!!! She is a tough person, optimistic in most times and hard working.

I believe eveyone has a good reason to be alive and every reason to be thankfull for all that comes into their life. I then stopped to ask and started to appreciate everything that I am, that I have and everything to come in my life whether good or bad, because it it the bad things afterall that makes us stronger. I then met a friend, helped me through my problems, stress and difficulties. was besides me and couldnt care less about what i have faced in my life. Every time i'd see him I knew he had a lot to offer. He is in my eyes the kind of person i have been hoping to meet and be with. He makes me laugh, cry for good reasons, forget all my problems, kept his promises and then I thought why is he so perfect???I then started asking the "why" questions and everything started to go wrong.

I later recalled that everything i wanted was and has been to be happy and now that things are wrong, i have a reason not to smile and start blaming God for all that i have. This guy has been sending his ex almost everyday, the same texts that i get she also has, funny thing now is that he denies it.You that moment in your life when you trust someone too much that he missuse the trust and you cant even beleive everything he's saying even though its something true???? that is how i'm feeling. it makes me take back all the good things I said about him, I gave him the benefit of the doubt and thought maybe he is not like all the guys but seeing and rememebring he is human i really did not see a need to have carried him like a diamond.

 Had thought life could be any easier because God knows i'm not as strong as my friend, but i was taught that God will never give me something i can't handle. Even though this may seem BIG now it is in His eyes small. My biggest problem is hw do i face and ask him?? WHAT DO I DO?????